update

Since my last blog, Dan and I have been praying that as we take steps forward, the Lord would open doors for us to walk through or close them.

At this time, it looks like the doors are being firmly closed.

Please continue to pray for this little girl (she's actually 19 months old, instead of 15 months, as I had previously posted). There's a very slight possibility that it could still happen, but I don't expect it to.

We were supposed to meet with the foster family tomorrow night, but that will not happen. I could go on about the reasons why and how I feel about them, but it would all be for naught.

Thank you for your prayers. I'll let you know if anything changes.

are you ready for this?

There's a pastor that we know that had talked to us around April about a pregnancy center in Louisiana that he and his wife had adopted two beautiful little girls from. We've thought about it but didn't really persue it at that time because of the craziness that summertime is for us with Dan being at camp and all that. Plus, I had run into some obstacles at work about how much time I could take off if we did adopt, which is a whole other blog in itself.

Well, that pastor called us yesterday and said that there is a lady, evidently, who is in Life Challenge and wants to give up her two children. I think they've placed the older child already, but they were looking to place the 15 month old little girl. The pastor said they know of several families who could take her, but the Lord laid us on there hearts.

We are so torn!

Of course our first thought is to unreservedly say, "YES!!! Of course we'll take this little girl!"

Oh, wait.

We live in an RV...can you adopt if you live in an RV? We've been thinking about buying a small house, but we're not there yet.

This would be a private adoption, which is far less expensive (anywhere from $2000-$5000 for private, depending on the circumstances), but that's still more money than we have access to. And from what we understand, this mom is ready to do this NOW. In fact the kids are already staying with another family.

These are the main points of hesitation. Dan explained this to the pastor, and his response was that when you want a child, someone calling you out of the blue asking you to take a child does not happen very often, so weigh everything carefully.

I mean, at this moment, I can't change where I live or how much money I have, so the only thing I know to do is pray and ask those around me to pray.

Pray for the will of the Father on behalf of this little girl and the family's situation.

Thank you!

a word of advice...

Don't go see Burn After Reading.

Trust me.

it really is a special day!

I can't forget a shout out to my friends that have a claim on this day, too!

Happy Birthday, Kablot and KJ!!!!!

Love you!!!!

Dan the Man

Happy anniversary, baby!

I can't believe it's been 14 years!!!

We've definitely had our share of ups and downs, but it's all been worth it. You take care of me and make me feel safe. You show me through your actions as well as your words how much you love me.

I love you, too!!!

any thoughts?

Read this.

I was shocked, myself.

In case you are not familiar, these are some songs written and made popular by Ray Boltz:
Watch the Lamb
Shepherd Boy (When others see a shepherd boy, God may see a King)
The Anchor Holds
I Will Praise the Lord

Any thoughts?

God is SO Good!

He is constantly showing me signs of His care at the perfect moments.

I love Him so...

No one ever cared for me like Jesus.
No one else has been so kind and true.
No one else could take the sin and darkness from me.
Oh, how much he cares for me!

I feel a change...

By the way, the tunes that are playing are from my walking playlist from my iPod. Just random stuff.

I haven't really said much about this, so consider this my first official post about training for the 10k.

Training.

That's a pretty funny word to me right now. Only because I don't consider myself "training", even though I am, technically. The reason why Dan and I are going to do this is for us. For our family that will be. So even as we are preparing, training if you will, for the 10k, we are establishing a change of life.

Personally, I have always been a big girl. I occasionally make the joke that I was born in a size 16...oh, to be that size again! I'd consider that skinny at this point in life. I've always been picked on and given a hard time about my size in school (the 16 that I would be proud to be now), which has made me very self conscious. But rather than cry about it, I've thought that, well, if people are going to crack jokes, I might as well laugh about it too, and I'd rather go ahead and crack the joke myself and break the ice rather than hear hurtful things that others say. It's okay if I say it...that makes a lot of sense, huh?

Athletics in school scared me to death. I remember one year in jr. high my nerves were so bad I threw up every day before athletics. Every day. I wasn't very coordinated and the biggest girl in my class, so being the last to finish everything, if I was able to finish it at all, or the last one chosen, or whatever was a huge embarassment. I hated it. So in high school, I chose not to put myself in that situation. I fulfilled whatever requirement there was for graduation purposes and that was it.

Now I look back and regret that I didn't push myself harder.

I want to finish this race.

It doesn't matter to me if I finish it running or walking. I just want to finish. I want to prove to myself that I can do it..that I'm not the butt of the joke anymore.

It also helps that there's this certain group of people I know and love who will be there running/walking for their own reasons and that we will all support each other until the end. How great is that?

As far as "training" goes, I've been walking in our complex. The trail I've been taking is right at a mile. That's all I'm doing right now. I'll add more as I go, and I do want to eventually incorporate some running, but that's later on. Right now I'm on a running restriction from when I hurt my foot from falling at work.

Right now, it's just a mile.

1 mile down.

5.2 to go.

Celebrating the small victories...

...like the fact that I didn't post the draft I wrote last night complaining about my job. I'm thankful that I have a job, and without it we would be in a world of hurt, which is the reason why I could not post it.

...I was home from work by 5:30.

...when I got home, I actually changed into comfortable real clothes instead of just going straight for the pajamas.

...I didn't have to suck in when I put on my pants.

...I did not get take out for supper.

Okay, that's about all I can think of right now.

But, dad-gum-it, we're gonna have a football game!

LUBBOCK, Texas - Despite nearly 10 inches of rain that fell in the Lubbock area over the last 36 hours and a State of Emergency being declared by city officials, Texas Tech's football game against SMU on Saturday evening at Jones AT&T Stadium will be played as scheduled. Kickoff is set for 6 p.m. and the game will be televised regionally on FSN.

The record rainfall caused massive flooding in the Lubbock area that forced the cancellation of classes at Texas Tech on Friday and public schools across the area were also closed. The heavy rains ultimately caused the Texas Tech pump system inside Jones AT&T Stadium to fail and that resulted in nearly a half of a foot of water on the playing field late Thursday night and into Friday.

Texas Tech Athletics is grateful for the support of the Lubbock Fire Department and other campus groups who came to the rescue in order to get the field prepared for Saturday's game. The Lubbock Fire Department had four trucks on the scene on Friday to help drain the field and other campus groups were able to help get the campus pumps back up and running.

Texas Tech urges fans to use caution and avoid flooded areas while traveling to Saturday's game and to not park on any grassy area once they reach campus. Fans are also reminded that umbrellas are not allowed in the gates at Jones AT&T Stadium.

my new friend

This is my new friend Grace.

Her mommy and daddy are the youth pastors at the church we go to when we are not out and about. She has an older brother Jordan and a twin brother Gavin.

Last night she was sitting in the lap of the music pastor's wife until her daughter could not understand why her mommy had this other little girl sitting in her lap and began pushing her off. So she got down and walked over to me with her arms up. I picked her up and that's where she stayed until shortly after this picture was taken.

Someone had left an empty Whataburger bag somewhere in the foyer. Being the good youth pastor's son that he is, Jordan found it and brought it over to his mom (instead, of course, putting it in the trash can). She sat it beside her for a moment. A split second later, Grace looks at me and has that almost-cry-look on her face that says she wants down. I put her down and watched her make a bee-line for that Whataburger bag.

I got trumped by a Whataburger bag.

A girl after my own heart.

Perspective

My sister called me at work day before yesterday. She's so funny because I can tell when she calls specifically to tell me something. It's always at a random time (while I'm at work), and even though she really wants to tell me what she's called about, she goes through the calling ritual first:

Stacy: Are you busy?
Me: No, I can talk for a few minutes.
Stacy: So, how are you?
Me: Fine...Are things good there?
Stacy: Yeah, things are good here. Do you know anything?
Me: No, not anything interesting. What about you?
Stacy: Yes, let me tell you what happened.

I love you, Stacy, but you know it's true. :)

Anyway, she starts telling me about a situation she encountered this week. I'm sorry, this may sound a little vague, but I can't give specifics. You'll get the idea, though.

A call was placed to a church (an AG church, by the way), and when the receiver picked up and said, "First Assembly," the caller began the reason for the call.

Interrupting the caller, the recipient said, "I'm sorry, but this is a business, I don't have time for this call." And hung up.

The caller called back. After getting the same "First Assembly" answer, the caller said, "Please do not hang up, this is not a marketing call. This is a church, right?" (Referring to the "this is a business" remark.)

"Well, yes."

"Okay, well I am calling on behalf of...."

"I'm sorry, but I am busy and do not have time for this call." Hung up again.

Three times this happened with the same outcome.

Here's the thing:
The caller has special needs and had to have assistance in making the call. Granted, the call, in reality, was a benevolence call to the church, and I don't know how many calls they may have received from this caller, which could account for the "busy-ness" of the recipient.

But for the one who assisted in the call...this one who grew up in a pastor's home and answered the door as well as the phone to many benevolence calls, handed them over to her dad and watched as he repectfully took care of the situation, whether it be by taking them to get gas or buy them groceries or even watching them walk away because they couldn't get cash...this one who knows God but doesn't really attend a church outside of her parents' because of the "Christians" who have the "right" to say things "in love" that are not lovely at all, but hurtful, and only serve to make themselves look better...this one who hears these three phone calls and wonders whatever happened to serving "the least of these"?...this one who wonders when the church became a business...this one was probably the one most affected by this call.

This one needed to hear compassion on the end of the line, even if they were unable to help. This one needed to witness someone taking the time to pray for an answer even if it meant a pause for one minute in going about the Father's business.

The Father's business.

This one needs us to have our priorities straight.

i like her

I like her A LOT!!!!

If you saw Sarah Palin's speech tonight, you know what I mean!

She made many valid points while keeping things real, but my favorite moment was when the camera went to the box seats where her family sat with Mrs. McCain.

Her youngest daughter was holding her baby brother, and, oblivious to the camera, stuck her tongue out and licked her whole hand from heel to fingertips to smooth down that baby's hair.

I laughed so hard I cried.

Huh-larious.