These last six months have been really difficult, for a number of reasons that I won't go into. Suffice it to say, it's been an emotional, financial, spiritual, physical battle that has left me feeling vulnerable and stripped of any confidence in myself, in every area of my life...personal, educational, ministry...all of it.
If you know my husband, you know he is an open book. He doesn't mind talking things out and just being upfront and honest about things.
Me....not so much.
I am happy to hole myself up in my house and avoid the world. Ridiculous, I know, but true, nonetheless.
A precious friend of mine made a way for me to attend a ladies' retreat this past weekend, and I was so ready to just get away and BE. I absolutely could not WAIT to get away without distraction, relax, and let the Lord pamper me and build me up....
Well....
The retreat definitely was AMAZING. The theme was Beauty for Ashes.
Worship was beautiful, and I cried.
Then someone would share their testimony, and I cried.
Then the person beside me started crying, so I cried, too.
The Lord definitely met me there and showered me with love.
(Wait....flashback of that 1989 Surface song is stuck in my head....Okay.)
BUT He also gave me a swift kick in the patooshie when He reminded me of the blessings He has continuously bestowed on me.
I remember being the sad woman who desperately longed for a baby, and would put a smile on her face and struggle to make it from point A to B without being too fake. Today I have a precious, beautiful, strong-willed two and a half year old who I can't imagine my life without. I have a sweet husband that, while neither of us will ever be perfect, takes care of us, protects us, looks out for us, and genuinely LOVES us! I have both of my parents that are good to me, well beyond what I deserve. I have true friends that stand with me, even when I want to stay holed up in my house.
And He also reminded me that ministry is everywhere I am, to everyone I come in contact with.
